Living in Obedience...or at least Trying (Part One)

Life really is a journey; one that we can't always plan or predict. Proverbs 16:9 says, "In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps." Again in Proverbs 19:21 we read, "Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails."

I have made many plans in the last couple of years. I have even made them with the intent of following the paths that God lays out for me. Somehow these "plans" have not always been fulfilled the way I expected. This past year has been…well…I don’t know what to call it! Here is the journey I have been on...the good, bad, pretty, and ugly! Through it I have learned a LOT and I know the learning is not over! I thank the Lord that despite the plans I make, His plans prevail!

In the spring of 2008, I began feeling like the Lord was opening the door for me to leave the job I was at...working as a Cancer Information Specialist with the American Cancer Society. I found a lot of satisfaction in my job, but I also bore a lot of sorrow that was not mine to carry! It was taking a toll on my health. I suffered chronic migraines, had restless sleep due to frequent job-related dreams, and the compassion that I typically had for people was growing thin. Several people in my life were noticing the effects that this job had on me and were counseling me to look for different work. I had a hard time doing that, because I felt like it was God who made a way for me to be there and I didn't know if what I was there for was complete. So, I started asking Him to let me know if it was time to move on.

I felt the movement of release from my job. But I didn't know what I was going to do! I thought about nursing school, completing a degree in Theology, or something else "school" related. Nothing seemed to "fit" at the moment. I continued along for quite a while in this place of my heart not really being in the day-to-day motions that I was living through. I was also dealing with a lot of health issues that really interfered with my ability to focus on anything outside of what was happening in the moment. I knew I was ready to leave, I just didn't know what to leave for!

In September, a prophetic word was spoken over me at church. I knew as soon as I heard it that the Lord was clarifying for me that not only was I ready to quit my job, He was ready for me to quit. That was pretty terrifying for me! After all, my job is the way I pay my bills, buy my food, and at the time much more important provided for medical expenses. My job was my security and my provision.

I went through that year at work, constantly feeling like I was in a place that I didn't belong. Work was fine. But underneath it all, in my heart of hearts, I knew I was disobeying the Lord. It was very hard to stomach! I was living in bondage, not freedom! And I will add, that the bondage I was in was because my view of what kept me safe was VERY skewed! Once again, I saw my job as my security and my provision. Without work, I would fall off the edge of a cliff and that would be the end! I was not going to quit my job until I had a clear picture of what it was I would be doing next. I told God this on multiple occasions. I even yelled at Him one night telling Him that what He was asking was unfair and that I WOULD NOT do what He was asking until I had another job! I sent out at least 60 resumes/applications throughout the year and got not one job offer! That had never happened to me, and I was taking it personally!

In the spring of 2009, now a year after all this began, I received another prophetic word, this one was very clear to the person delivering it as well as me; I was to quit my job. I couldn't do it! I didn't trust God enough to meet my every need. Despite the fact that during this time He had provided very inexpensive housing for me, provided a car, and surrounded me with people who would support me in the decision to leave. I could not bring myself to obey!

I started looking at options that would offer a "clause" to the leaving a job with no other job lined up and not having the savings needed to survive without work. As I mentioned, I had thought about going to a school of theology. I wanted more understanding of the heart of God and the destiny that He set in motion when He created me! I wanted to know what it was to live on the edge and trust that God will keep me from falling. So I applied to Bethel, a non-accredited school of Biblical Studies in California. I was VERY excited about going! I put my notice in at work and a wave of peace and release came over me. I had finally listened to the Lord...or had I? What had He been asking of me? Was it just about quitting my job? NO. It was about allowing Him to be my provision and my security. These were two things that I just didn’t trust Him to be!

I found out just two weeks before I was going to move to California that I didn't get accepted to Bethel. I was heart-broken. That doesn't even begin to encompass what was happening in my heart! My plan had failed! I was now living in a temporary housing situation that was to end in a few weeks, had quit my job, and my heart was in the pit of rejection! I was terrified! What had God done? Why had He asked me to take the steps I had been taking? Why didn't I get accepted? What was I going to do now? These and many more questions swarmed in my head! I was so "lost" in this time that I had my doctor prescribe anti-depressants just so I could carry myself through each day. I couldn't think clearly, I couldn't feel clearly, and sometimes I couldn't breathe clearly!

When I found out I didn’t get accepted to Bethel, my supervisor at work told me that if I wanted to keep my job they would welcome me back. I just needed to make the decision within two days. A blessing. Right? Well, the thing is that I KNOW that what the Lord had asked of me was to leave my job. That was ultimately my primary reason for applying to Bethel. It was the clause. If I left going to something, then I wasn't being irresponsible by leaving my job without another lined up. I knew the sense of relief and peace that came over me when I turned in my resignation. And I knew the excitement that was in my heart of getting to do something different than talking about cancer all day! I had experienced the first part of obedience and I didn't want to go back on that. On the flip-side of that truth, I also didn't feel like I could justify not taking my job back. It had been offered to me; without consequence of my intent to leave. I didn't feel like I could justify being jobless and living in someone's home as a guest, knowing that I could have done something to at least keep my job. The torment of making this decision (and in two days none-the-less) was horrific! I decided that 1) I could always quit again if I felt like I should and 2) they were about to go through lay-offs and if I got laid off instead of quitting I could at least have access to continued health care options. Whereas those are both valid thoughts, I am here to say that choosing to disobey the Lord just because we think we can justify it is wrong! It is still disobedience!

I kept my job and the following few months were some of the hardest and most difficult that I have ever experienced! They did go through lay-offs, but I kept my job. Some might declare this as a blessing. I didn’t. I was still living in fear of what could happen if I obeyed the Lord and fear of what would happen if I didn't. That was the spiritual side. On the practical side...when many people are laid off, the workload feels much heavier to those that are left behind! I may have had a job, but I was miserable!

In January, I finally decided that I could not keep running. The Lord was not changing what He had asked of me! The Lord was still urging me to see my security and provision in Him, not in the American Cancer Society! I turned in my resignation and left after almost 5 years of working for the same company. It was a bitter-sweet parting! I really did love the work I did. I was good at it. I made a difference in someone's life each and every day that I was there. Now, what was I leaving to? I had no clue! And I would be lying through my teeth if I said I was anything but frightened of what was to come!

BELOA

OK. So I think I might be sort-of back from my BELOA (Blogger's Extended Leave of Absence).

I have been in a bit of a funk over the last couple of months and just needed to let some things go for a bit. I stopped writing on my blog and gave myself a reprieve from making my bed one day a week. Then, I took my car through a car wash - the kind where you actually get out so they can vacuum the inside for you before running it through the sprayer thingy and then the guys dry the car for you. I also got a pedicure. All of this in the last month-and-a-half. It was nice to let go of a few things and treat myself to a couple of others. I needed it.

However, the funk is not gone. Life just isn't what I want it to be - or what I planned and I think I am having a hard time figuring out how to move forward with joy and confidence. I am still a long-term guest in a home that is not my own. I don't have my cats. I still have no clue what I want to be doing or am supposed to be doing for "life-work". Then there are all of the other things of life - health, finances, relationships... I am so restless where I am, yet I completely lack the energy or courage to make any changes right now! Please don't take these all for complaints! That is part of the reason for my BELOA! I needed to take some time to try to re-focus on the things that really are important to me and somehow find them - or find me in them. I'm not there. I am around, though.

Oh, I am Just Not Ready

I am just not ready for the weekend to end and to go back to work tomorrow. I have so greatly enjoyed the solitude and the time away. It was great to have two consecutive days where I didn't have to talk to anyone about cancer and where I didn't have to talk to anyone about not going to school. I got to spend time doing fun things that are healing to my heart in some funny way. I got to hang out with just God and myself. I spent time watering plants and trees and birds and making the house all clean and sweet smelling. It was just such a great weekend that I am not ready for it to end! I rather like having time alone, away from the realities of sickness and pain and the fragility of human-kind. I'm not saying I would want it this way forever - not at all. I just don't think I'm ready right now. Alas, it is 9:00 pm, which means it is time to get everything laid out and ready for work tomorrow because the day will be coming ... ready or not!

Today

I told a friend at work the other day that I just wasn't "bouncing back" as quickly as I would like from this whole Bethel thing. It was hard for me to make plans to go and then in the blink of an eye have to change course! I haven't done a lot of talking to other people or blogging about this, because I really wanted to spend time with God and know that I know that I am good with Him before dealing with the periphery of everyone else's thoughts and opinions. I need to know what God is saying to me in this. Not so much what Adam, Brandy, and Caleb are saying.

I think that today something in me turned a bit. I have had time to lounge around and spend time with ME. I said "no" to going to an amusement park with friends, helping with a service project at church, and helping to take care of a friend who isn't feeling well this weekend - for the sheer purpose of just having some alone time. All of the other things would have been great too, but they weren't what I really needed - they were distractions right now! I would have been very blessed to have spent the day with friends playing, serving with my church, or loving on a friend that needed me. Those are all things that would have blessed other people too, in some way. They just weren't what was needed. I had to choose which was the best investment of my time today. Sometimes these choices are hard, but I am glad that I chose the way I did.

My heart somehow feels less burdened. I feel a little more confident in resting in the Lord for direction. I have been singing and smiling and enjoying the day. I got some things accomplished, and that is good. I made laundry soap - which spells super yummy and I can't wait to finish off the last batch so I can start using this one! I played some games on the computer. I spent some time outside. It was just a great day - and I am very thankful for it!

The Plans Seem to be Changing

Without saying too much - primarily because I do not feel like I have a lot in me to say - the plans are changing. I will probably write some things to post later, but don't feel as though I can really put my thoughts and feelings together into coherent words at the moment. I am not going to Bethel, however.

I am terribly sad! Even more than I am sad, I am very confused! I know that time (and a lot of prayer and rest before the Lord) will offer consolation and answers. For right now, I just feel a bit lost - and as if I have lost something!

As I'm sure you know, this came as a great surprise! It was not what I expected. I do still declare that the Lord, God, has ordered my steps! He will not lead me into harm and will not lead me away from His goodness! This whole process has been greatly bathed in prayer by myself and many trusted friends. We have been praying for a FULL provision of the Lord in this! I trust that even if it is not what I expected, this door closing at this time is mercy and provision by God!

Please be praying for me to have a great understanding, comfort, and peace. Please also pray that I pick myself up well and continue stronger, braver, wiser, and more committed to the Lord than I was before! May His glory be shown in this! Thank you!

My Current Obsession and The Gift of Restoration

My current obsession is getting my support letters signed, stuffed, sealed, and sent! It's taking much longer than I expected. I guess it doesn't help that I am writing a little (or long) personal note to everyone. It just seems that it's appropriate to do! So, it is taking a L-O-N-G time for me to get them out! I now have several completely done and ready to go and many other's just about there. The other thing I have learned that may have saved me some time is that I should have just made a mailing list and printed labels! I thought about it and then decided not to, because I thought it would be more personal if I hand labeled all of the envelopes. I think that when I send out my update letters, they will be machine labeled!

While I'm taking a break from the very urgent task at hand, I want to tell you a really cool story from this morning.

While I was sitting at the table eating my breakfast, a young female cardinal slammed into the window. She fell fast to the ground! I jumped up and ran over to the window and gasped when I saw her lying on the ground. She was stone-still on her back, head toppled to the side, beak and eyes wide open. I thought for sure she was either dead, or would be shortly. I ran outside and kneeled down beside her and just started crying over her. I felt like the Spirit was asking me to "bless her". So I began to pray for her through my tears.

I saw a slow rise in her chest - then stillness again. I reached over and gently laid my hands on her chest -- something I have always been taught to never do! Don't touch wild birds - if they survive, it may be difficult for them to "re-enter" the wild...so I have been told. I just felt like it was the right thing to do, though. I continued praying for her, this time claiming dominion as given in Genesis. A minute later, another rise in the chest and a quick blink of the eye! I continued praying and asking God to revive his created one to the fullness that He made her in. I stroked her head very gently and started claiming her health; wholeness; recovery from this accident. Within about five minutes, she twitched her talons and picked her head up. A few minutes later, she flicked her wing and turned to her feet; standing very still. I backed away from her a bit, to not frighten her and continued to pray.

A little murmer of a song came out of her and then she flew about 2 feet toward me and stopped about a foot away from my hand. I reached toward her to see if she would flinch, and she didn't. So, I continued to touch her chest while I prayed some more. It wasn't long after that that she flew a few feet away from me and landed on a window sill on the porch and just perched there for about 30 minutes. She was flicking her tail, adjusting her wings, and breathing beautifully! I knew she was ok! More than that, I knew that God had revived her!! He heard my hearts cry for this little bird and was moved to re-create His created that was surely lost! I gave her a name - "Mercy" because the mercy of God was shown. It was beautiful!

It served as a great encouragement to me. Not only did it remind me of the authority that has been given to me in Christ Jesus, but it also reminded me even more how much my Father in Heaven will care for me! This is such a great reminder at any time, but so powerful right now! I am letting go and leaving behind just about all that I humanly call my provision and trusting in God to provide for me. It can be very frightening! But I cling to my faith and trust that God - in His love and goodness provides for me! It reminded me of Matthew 6:26-33 (NLT) - emphasis mine.

"Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to Him than they are? Can all your worries add a single moment to your life? And why worry about your clothing? Look at the lilies of the field and how they grow. They don’t work or make their clothing, yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, He will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith? So don’t worry about these things, saying, ‘What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?’ These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and He will give you everything you need."

Now it's back to signing, stuffing, sealing, and sending! If I don't have your address and you would like to receive a support letter, please e-mail your address and I will get it out to you - with a personalized note! Blessings, my dear friends!

I'm Back!

My blog has been a bit neglected in the past weeks. It isn't because I haven't had anything to say! In fact, I have thought through at least 20 complete blogs that I would have liked to have posted. I just haven't had 1) the time to stop and write or 2) the easy access. I have been checking in on my friends blogs from my phone so that I could stay on top of what everyone else has been posting - I just hate trying to concentrate on writing out what I am thinking about while trying to type on a keyboard that is 1 inch by 1.5 inches. =)

So, today I would like to post my response from my quiet time this morning. I thought it was quite appropriate to post. Enjoy reading.

I'm a Captive Set Free!

In Luke 4, we see a scene where our Lord, Jesus, went to the synagogue in Nazareth. He chose to read from Isaiah 61:1-2.

"The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, for He has appointed me to preach Good News to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim the captives will be released, that the blind will see, that the down trodden will be freed from their oppressors, and that the time of the Lord's favor has come!"

I have been captive to many things; sin, sickness, and fear - just to name a few. But God has set me free! This scripture in Isaiah continues.

"To all who mourn - the time of the Lord's favor has come and with it, the day of God's anger against their enemies. To all who mourn (in Israel), He will give beauty for ashes, joy for mourning, praise instead of despair. For the Lord has planted them like strong and graceful oaks for His own glory!"

It is the Lord, God, who set us free!

I am privileged to have an opportunity to dedicate myself to a time of learning more about how God desires to move. I welcome the opportunity to learn how He desires to use His (broken and redeemed) children to bring forth His will and work on earth. I believe that God has great desires for this nation and world - I want a greater understanding of what these are and how to move in the power He established us with to accomplish this!

I know God is calling me, and I have decided to attend a ministry training school where the power of God is present! The instructors are fully submitted to Jesus and desire to chase after Him and accomplish the work He intends - all of the work He intends for us to do.

When Jesus walked this earth, He did so with great power! Of course! He is God! He gave His disciples the authority and instruction to do the same! I believe that just as the Lord instructed His twelve (disciples) to go out and heal the sick, raise the dead, and cast out the demons; we are (still) given the authority, power, and instruction to do these things! "Give fully as you have received" (Matthew 10:7-8)

It is just simply not enough for me to be a spectator in the spiritual war - I must engage!

"Therefore: Be strong with the Lord's mighty power! Put on all God's armor so that you will be able to stand firm against all strategies and tricks of the devil. For we are not fighting against flesh and blood, but against the evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world; against those mighty powers of darkness who rule this world, and against wicked spirits in the heavenly realms.

Use every piece of God's armor to resist the enemy in the time of evil, so that after the battle you will still be standing firm. Stand your ground, putting on the sturdy belt of truth and the body armor of God's righteousness. For shoes, put on the peace that comes from the Good News, so that you will be fully prepared. In every battle you will need faith as your shield to stop the fiery arrows aimed at you by satan. Put on salvation as your helmet, and take up the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God.

Pray at all times and on every occasion in the power of the Holy Spirit. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers everywhere. And pray for me too. Ask God to give me the right words as I boldly explain God's plan that the Good News is for all. I am in chains now for preaching this message as God's ambassador. But pray that I will keep on speaking boldly for Him as I should." (Ephesians 6:10-20)

Quite Possibly the Saddest Day Yet

Today was quite possibly the saddest day I have yet had. As of about noon, I am no longer a pet owner. It is the hardest part of this whole transition! I had to find new homes for my cats. All three of them got to stay together and they went to a wonderful family that I know from church. I know they will be well cared for, will get prayed for and blessed regularly, and will be treated with a great deal of love and respect. It is still so hard, though!

As I was preparing to leave the house with them today, the overwhelming sadness slammed into me like a tidal wave! I couldn't catch my breath! I knew I was doing the right thing, but it just hurt so bad! I felt like Piglet in Winnie the Pooh - "I'm not quite brave enough." I called on the Lord and He answered! He ushered in the strength needed - and even brought in a great deal of peace and some joy. It was still very difficult!

Noelle and Cinnamon transitioned very well! They eased in and found their way through the house. They got acquainted with Obie and Chewie (the two cats that already reside in the house). By the time I left, they were perfectly fine and were acting as if they have always belonged in this place. Truffle has a different tale, however. He was not too happy with the change. He groaned and growled. He didn't want to be in his cage, out of his cage, held, anything...he just wanted to go home! How sad it was for me to try to communicate to him that this was his new home! We finally left him locked in a very small powder room with his ball, carrier, and some water. He seemed ok with that - but still not the happy-go-lucky baby I know him to be. I know he will be fine! It makes me feel so much better to know that at least the girls adjusted well - within moments of entering the house.

I am doing ok. Very sad, but doing well. I know that God is preparing me for a time to focus on learning more about Him and growing in that. He was very faithful to provide a loving home for my babies. He has been faithful to provide peace to me, in the midst of a LOT of change!

Stop or Go?

Moving day No.1 is just 5 days away. There are empty boxes stacked up against the wall outside of my bedroom and a smattering of packed boxes here and there in my room. There are stray pieces of furniture that didn't sell at the garage sale in the living room, my bedroom, and in the laundry room. My closet still has clothes in it. My filing cabinet - which is staying where I have been living - is still full. I have 1/3 of my books packed. My movies are packed away, but the box is left open just in case I need something to entertain me while I pack away the rest.

I woke up yesterday morning for work and felt like a load of bricks had fallen all over my body - and I had swallowed a drawer full of knives. I think the stress got to me! I had a horrid headache, my stomach was sick, my throat was very sore, and by all of the joints in my body were stiff and screaming at me for trying to move! I couldn't miss work, so I got ready and showed up. I looked at our PTO log and saw that we had several available spots for the next few days, so I requested some time off! I now have today, tomorrow, and Thursday off. I got home from work yesterday at 3:00 and crashed! I slept hard for a few hours, woke up and made dinner, went back to sleep. I woke up today at about 9:00 - for a total of about 16 hours of sleep. My throat and tummy feel a bit better, but I still have a headache and body ache!

I know I have a TON to do, but I am tempted to just take it easy today so that I feel more like pushing hard tomorrow and Thursday. We'll see what happens! A few days ago, I posted on facebook that my Things to Do list was now 7 pages long...correction...it is now 9! I just keep thinking that once I get moved a HUGE step will be done!! Then I can focus on support letters, meeting with people, and gearing myself up for moving again! =)

At least I now have a wonderful home for my sweet cats! I am blown away by the amazing provision of God in this! A family I know from church offered to take all three of my cats for me! They already have two cats of their own - and a little boy (who is super sweet and adorable!) They are such a sweet family! I know they are going to love and bless my babies so well! I can rest in knowing that they will be well cared for!

No More Secrets!

The last month has been a little hard. It has felt like I have been keeping this huge secret! In every circle I am a part of, I have wanted to just shout out and tell everyone that I am planning to go to Bethel. I haven't been able to because there have been certain people that I didn't want to find out through the grapevine - I wanted to tell them! People like my family, my closest friends, and my pastors. Well, it's summer and that means that everyone is away on vacations and mission trips and this and that. I have been telling people as I can because the time is close and I am making arrangements. Plus, when people looked horribly shocked and make comments like "Something huge must be happening if you're looking for homes for your cats." I feel like telling them anything but the whole truth would be...well...a lie! (Side note here - I haven't been not telling people what's happening. It has just been really important to me that some people find out from me - not someone else - that I am picking up and moving to California!)

I have now spoken with my pastor and church leadership. I have been able to tell my family. I have told almost all of my closest friends - and have let those individuals I haven't been able to meet with know that I have news to tell them. And, as of today I have officially told my supervisor and manager that I will be leaving in the fall. I didn't submit an official resignation, since I still have time, but let them know that I was planning on leaving. I just feel so much more freedom, knowing that I'm not holding this "secret" in. So share away!

Another bonus to me being able to freely share is that more people can be happy for me and rejoice with me! I am so excited about this and I want the people in my life to be excited with me!

Leaps of Faith

I think we all go through seasons in our life where we feel like we are just wandering somewhat aimlessly; despirately searching for where we are supposed to be, what we are supposed to be doing, and just knowing that there is something more around the bend...but where is the bend in a wilderness?

I have been in one of those seasons lately. I have been happy enough, just not fully content in my situation; knowing that the Lord has called me to something more but not knowing what it is. Well, I am overjoyed to say that I feel like I have some answers to many of the questions I have been asking God. He has been speaking them to me for quite some time, but I was too afraid to really listen. I wanted the answer, but had deaf ears. I don't think it has been pointless. In fact, I believe the last year has served me very well! I feel like I have a greater understanding of "walking through fire and not being burned." I feel like I have a greater understanding of what it is to be disciplined in love and mercy, not in anger and fear. I have a greater understanding of my own temperment, personality, needs, and desires. Most of all, I have a more intimate relationship with God! Amazing that all of that can come out of a year of wandering!

So, what is the answer? I'm heading off to another season of schooling! This one much different than the last! (This is all presuming I am accepted - which I would love prayers about!) I am very excited! So much so that I just want my wording here to be perfect, which I know is impossible!

Over the last year, I have spent a lot of time looking at a school of ministry in Redding, California; Bethel (www.ibethel.org). I have been drawn to what was happening there. Many times I have opened the application and started to fill it out, but have always stopped myself. I didn't feel like it was the right time. What about money? I am in treatment for two chronic health conditions, so I have to have health insurance! I am trying to pay off student loans, not acquire more student debt. It is in freakin' California - that's far from Texas! The list of excuses goes on!

I still feel drawn. In fact, I feel sad about the prospect of not being there - and I haven't even gone! I hear that still voice of the Lord very clearly asking me to submit. He is asking me how long I am going to wait. He has asked me why I haven't already done it. I know it is the right thing. So, I started looking at each of my excuses. The response to each one of them was fear! I am afraid of not being in control! I am afraid of asking for support! I am afraid of going somewhere new! I am afraid of failure! But in the Lord, there is no fear! "For God did not give us a spirit of fear and timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline." 2 Timothy 1:7

So, the preparations have begun! I am moving out of my current home at the end of the month and will be staying with a family from church until I leave for school in September. I am ready to submit my application. I have my support letter written and just about ready to copy and send out. Both of these actions are just on hold until my pastors to get back from Turkey so I can talk to them about this, get a reccommendation, and have one of them help me finalize the letter. I am trying to find homes for my precious, sweet, adorable kitty cats (call me if you want to foster one of them)! This one is really hard, but even in it I have peace and joy - which helps confirm that this is right.

There is still a lot to do, but God is giving me the grace to take baby steps - very quickly!! It's amazing! Since I made the decision to follow through on this - and actually started taking action - I have had more peace and joy than I have in over a year. Once again, this is not to say that I have been moping around for the last year. I have just known that God was calling me to something new and I wasn't sure what it was. Now I feel like I know and it is great!

If you want to be included in the support and newsletter mailings, please make sure I have your address. Like I said, this is happening faster than I am used to working. Therefore, I know I am missing some people. Just e-mail me and I will make sure you are on the list. And thanks in advance for the prayers and support!